Marcus Tullius Cicero→Titus Pomponius Atticus|c. 49 BC|Cicero|From Rome|To Rome/Athens|AI-assisted
After I had sealed my earlier letter, I decided not to give it to the person I had intended, because he was a stranger. So it was not sent that day. Meanwhile Philotimus came and delivered a letter from you. What you write about my brother shows too little firmness, but nothing underhanded, nothing deceitful, nothing inflexible against goodness, nothing that cannot be turned wherever you want by one conversation. In short, all his people, even those with whom he is often angry, are still dear to him; I myself am dearer to him than his own life. I do not blame him for writing one way about the boy to you and another way to the boy's mother.
What you write about Quintus and your sister is distressing, all the more because these are times in which I cannot remedy the matter. I certainly would remedy it, but you see amid what evils and in what despair of affairs we are. As for the money matter, I often hear from him himself, and it is not the kind of situation in which he does not want to satisfy you or is not working at it. But if Quintus Axius, in this flight of mine, does not repay the sum I lent his son and uses the times as an excuse; if Lepta and the others do the same; am I supposed to be surprised when I hear from Quintus that he is being pressed for a comparatively small amount? You surely see his tight position. Still, he orders that the matter be handled for you in any case. Do you think him slow or tight-fisted in this sort of thing? No one is less so.
Enough about my brother. As for his son, his father has certainly always indulged him. But indulgence does not make a person a liar or greedy or unloving toward his own family; perhaps it makes him fierce, arrogant, and hostile. So he does have the faults that arise from indulgence, but those are tolerable, what shall I say, in the young men of this age. The faults that, to me at least, who love him, are more miserable than these very evils in which we live, do not come from my compliance. They have their own roots. I would certainly tear them out if I were allowed. But the times are such that I must bear everything.
My own son I easily hold in hand; nothing is more manageable than he is. His compassion has made my plans weaker until now, and the more he wants me to be resolute, the more I fear I may prove too cruel toward him.
Antony arrived yesterday evening. Perhaps he will come to me now, or perhaps not even that, since he has written what he wants done. You will know at once what happened. For me now, nothing but secrecy.
What shall I do about the boys? Shall I entrust them to a small boat? What courage do you think I shall have at sea? I remember how anxious I was in summer when sailing with him in that open Rhodian boat. What do you think it will be like in rough weather in a little dispatch boat? Misery on every side.
Trebatius was with me, plainly a good man and a good citizen. Immortal gods, what monstrous things he reports. Is even Balbus thinking of coming to the Senate? Tomorrow I will give Trebatius himself a letter for you. I think Vettienus is my friend, as you write. Because he wrote to me rather curtly about arranging the money, I joked back a little sharply. If he took it differently from how he should, smooth it over. I addressed him as "mint commissioner" because he addressed me as "proconsul." But since he is a decent man and cares for us, let him also be cared for by us. Farewell.
After sealing my former letter, I did not feel inclined to hand it to the person that I had intended, as he was a stranger; so it was not despatched on that day. Meantime Philotimus came and gave me
a letter from you. The conduct of my brother about which you write shows little firmness, but no chicanery, no treachery, nothing inflexibly opposed to goodness, nothing that cannot be turned where you will by a single conversation. In short all his relations, even those with whom he is so often angry, are nevertheless dear to him, and I to be sure am dearer than life. I do not blame him for writing in one strain about his boy to you and in another to the boy's mother. I am distressed by what you say about the journey and your sister, and the more so because the times are such that I cannot remedy the matter. For certainly I would have done so: but you see in what trouble I am, what desperation.
As for his financial affairs, I often hear from him, and they are not in such a state as to prevent him from being anxious to pay you and from making efforts to that end: but if Q. Axius does not pay me in this my flight the £100 I lent his son, and pleads in excuse the state of the times, and if Lepta and others do the same, I confess I am always surprised to hear from Quintus that he is pressed for some £175. For of course you see his straits. However he has ordered the sum to be paid to your account. Perhaps you suppose that he is slow or close-fisted in money matters. No one is less so: but enough about my brother.
As for his son, the father has certainly always indulged him; but indulgence does not make him a liar or a miser or disloyal to his friends, though it does perhaps make him surly, haughty and aggressive. Accordingly he has these defects which are due to spoiling; but they are not intolerable, shall I say, as young men go nowadays. But the defects which, to
me at any rate who love him, are more distressing than even the evils on which we have fallen, do not proceed from any indulgence of mine; for they are deep rooted: but I would have rooted them up, had I been allowed. But the times are such that I must bear everything. My own son I control easily. He is quite tractable. My own policy has lacked vigour owing to my pity for him; and the more he wants me to be unflinching, the more I fear I may prove cruel to him.
Well Antony came yesterday evening; soon perhaps he will visit me, perhaps not even that, as he has written what he wanted done; but you shall know forthwith what has happened. All I do now is done secretly.
What shall I do about the boys? Shall I entrust them to a small boat? What courage do you suppose I shall have on the voyage? For I remember sailing in the summer in an open Rhodian boat with them and how anxious I was; and how do you suppose it will be in the bad season in a tiny pinnace? Misery everywhere!
Trebatius is with me, a real man and a loyal citizen. Ye gods, what awful news he brings! So even Balbus is thinking of attending the Senate! But I will give Trebatius himself a letter for you to-morrow. I agree with your letter that Vettienus is friendly to me. But I made a rather bitter jest at his expense, because he wrote curtly to me about paying my debt. Appease him, if he took it in bad part. I addressed him by his title "commissioner of the mint" because he addressed me as "proconsul." But since he is a good man and has affection for me, let me keep my affection for him. Farewell.
[1] obsignata iam epistula superiore non placuit ei dari cui constitueram quod erat alienus. itaque eo die data non est. interim venit Philotimus et mihi a te litteras reddidit. quibus quae de fratre meo scribis, sunt ea quidem parum firma sed habent nihil hupoulon, nihil fallax, nihil non flexibile ad bonitatem, nihil quod non quo velis uno sermone possis perducere; ne multa, omnis suos, etiam quibus irascitur crebrius, tamen caros habet, me quidem se ipso cariorem. quod de puero aliter ad te scripsit et ad matrem de filio, non reprehendo. de Quinto et de sorore quae scribis molesta sunt eoque magis quod ea tempora nostra sunt ut ego iis mederi non possim. nam certe mederer; sed quibus in malis et qua in desperatione rerum simus vides. [2] illa de ratione nummaria non sunt eius modi (saepe enim audio ex ipso) ut non cupiat tibi praestare et in eo laboret. sed si mihi Q. Axius in hac mea fuga HS X_I_I_I_ non reddit quae dedi eius filio mutua et utitur excusatione temporis, si Lepta, si ceteri, soleo mirari de nescio quis HS X_X_ cum audio ex illo se urgeri. vides enim profecto angustias. curari tamen ea tibi utique iubet. an existimas illum in isto genere lentulum aut restrictum? nemo est minus. [3] de fratre satis. de eius filio indulsit illi quidem suus pater semper sed non facit indulgentia mendacem aut avarum aut non amantem suorum, ferocem fortasse atque adrogantem et infestum facit. itaque habet haec quoque quae nascuntur ex indulgentia, sed ea sunt tolerabilia (quid enim dicam?) hac iuventute; ea vero, quae mihi quidem qui illum amo sunt his ipsis malis in quis sumus miseriora, non sunt ab obsequio nostro. nam suas radices habent; quas tamen evellerem profecto, si liceret. sed ea tempora sunt ut omnia mihi sint patienda. ego meum facile teneo; nihil est enim eo tractabilius. quoius quidem misericordia languidiora adhuc consilia cepi et quo ille me certiorem vult esse eo magis timeo ne in eum exsistam crudelior. [4] sed Antonius venit heri vesperi. iam fortasse ad me veniet aut ne id quidem, quoniam scripsit quid fieri vellet. sed scies continuo quid actum sit. nos iam nihil nisi occulte. de pueris quid agam? parvone navigio committam? quid mihi animi in navigando censes fore? recordor enim aestate cum illo Rhodiorum aphraktoi navigans quam fuerim sollicitus; quid duro tempore anni actuariola fore censes? O rem undique miseram! Trebatius erat mecum, vir plane et civis bonus. quae ille monstra, di immortales! etiamne Balbus in senatum venire cogitet? sed ei ipsi cras ad te litteras dabo. Vettienum mihi amicum, ut scribis, ita puto esse. Cum eo, quod apotomos ad me scripserat de nummis curandis, thumikoteron eram iocatus. id tu, si ille aliter acceperit ac debuit, lenies. 'MONETALI' autem adscripsi, quod ille ad me 'PRO COS.' sed quoniam est homo et nos diligit, ipse quoque a nobis diligatur. vale.
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After I had sealed my earlier letter, I decided not to give it to the person I had intended, because he was a stranger. So it was not sent that day. Meanwhile Philotimus came and delivered a letter from you. What you write about my brother shows too little firmness, but nothing underhanded, nothing deceitful, nothing inflexible against goodness, nothing that cannot be turned wherever you want by one conversation. In short, all his people, even those with whom he is often angry, are still dear to him; I myself am dearer to him than his own life. I do not blame him for writing one way about the boy to you and another way to the boy's mother.
What you write about Quintus and your sister is distressing, all the more because these are times in which I cannot remedy the matter. I certainly would remedy it, but you see amid what evils and in what despair of affairs we are. As for the money matter, I often hear from him himself, and it is not the kind of situation in which he does not want to satisfy you or is not working at it. But if Quintus Axius, in this flight of mine, does not repay the sum I lent his son and uses the times as an excuse; if Lepta and the others do the same; am I supposed to be surprised when I hear from Quintus that he is being pressed for a comparatively small amount? You surely see his tight position. Still, he orders that the matter be handled for you in any case. Do you think him slow or tight-fisted in this sort of thing? No one is less so.
Enough about my brother. As for his son, his father has certainly always indulged him. But indulgence does not make a person a liar or greedy or unloving toward his own family; perhaps it makes him fierce, arrogant, and hostile. So he does have the faults that arise from indulgence, but those are tolerable, what shall I say, in the young men of this age. The faults that, to me at least, who love him, are more miserable than these very evils in which we live, do not come from my compliance. They have their own roots. I would certainly tear them out if I were allowed. But the times are such that I must bear everything.
My own son I easily hold in hand; nothing is more manageable than he is. His compassion has made my plans weaker until now, and the more he wants me to be resolute, the more I fear I may prove too cruel toward him.
Antony arrived yesterday evening. Perhaps he will come to me now, or perhaps not even that, since he has written what he wants done. You will know at once what happened. For me now, nothing but secrecy.
What shall I do about the boys? Shall I entrust them to a small boat? What courage do you think I shall have at sea? I remember how anxious I was in summer when sailing with him in that open Rhodian boat. What do you think it will be like in rough weather in a little dispatch boat? Misery on every side.
Trebatius was with me, plainly a good man and a good citizen. Immortal gods, what monstrous things he reports. Is even Balbus thinking of coming to the Senate? Tomorrow I will give Trebatius himself a letter for you. I think Vettienus is my friend, as you write. Because he wrote to me rather curtly about arranging the money, I joked back a little sharply. If he took it differently from how he should, smooth it over. I addressed him as "mint commissioner" because he addressed me as "proconsul." But since he is a decent man and cares for us, let him also be cared for by us. Farewell.
AI-assisted translation - This translation was produced with AI assistance and has not been peer-reviewed. See the 19th-century translation or original Latin/Greek below for scholarly use.
Latin / Greek Original
[1] obsignata iam epistula superiore non placuit ei dari cui constitueram quod erat alienus. itaque eo die data non est. interim venit Philotimus et mihi a te litteras reddidit. quibus quae de fratre meo scribis, sunt ea quidem parum firma sed habent nihil hupoulon, nihil fallax, nihil non flexibile ad bonitatem, nihil quod non quo velis uno sermone possis perducere; ne multa, omnis suos, etiam quibus irascitur crebrius, tamen caros habet, me quidem se ipso cariorem. quod de puero aliter ad te scripsit et ad matrem de filio, non reprehendo. de Quinto et de sorore quae scribis molesta sunt eoque magis quod ea tempora nostra sunt ut ego iis mederi non possim. nam certe mederer; sed quibus in malis et qua in desperatione rerum simus vides. [2] illa de ratione nummaria non sunt eius modi (saepe enim audio ex ipso) ut non cupiat tibi praestare et in eo laboret. sed si mihi Q. Axius in hac mea fuga HS X_I_I_I_ non reddit quae dedi eius filio mutua et utitur excusatione temporis, si Lepta, si ceteri, soleo mirari de nescio quis HS X_X_ cum audio ex illo se urgeri. vides enim profecto angustias. curari tamen ea tibi utique iubet. an existimas illum in isto genere lentulum aut restrictum? nemo est minus. [3] de fratre satis. de eius filio indulsit illi quidem suus pater semper sed non facit indulgentia mendacem aut avarum aut non amantem suorum, ferocem fortasse atque adrogantem et infestum facit. itaque habet haec quoque quae nascuntur ex indulgentia, sed ea sunt tolerabilia (quid enim dicam?) hac iuventute; ea vero, quae mihi quidem qui illum amo sunt his ipsis malis in quis sumus miseriora, non sunt ab obsequio nostro. nam suas radices habent; quas tamen evellerem profecto, si liceret. sed ea tempora sunt ut omnia mihi sint patienda. ego meum facile teneo; nihil est enim eo tractabilius. quoius quidem misericordia languidiora adhuc consilia cepi et quo ille me certiorem vult esse eo magis timeo ne in eum exsistam crudelior. [4] sed Antonius venit heri vesperi. iam fortasse ad me veniet aut ne id quidem, quoniam scripsit quid fieri vellet. sed scies continuo quid actum sit. nos iam nihil nisi occulte. de pueris quid agam? parvone navigio committam? quid mihi animi in navigando censes fore? recordor enim aestate cum illo Rhodiorum aphraktoi navigans quam fuerim sollicitus; quid duro tempore anni actuariola fore censes? O rem undique miseram! Trebatius erat mecum, vir plane et civis bonus. quae ille monstra, di immortales! etiamne Balbus in senatum venire cogitet? sed ei ipsi cras ad te litteras dabo. Vettienum mihi amicum, ut scribis, ita puto esse. Cum eo, quod apotomos ad me scripserat de nummis curandis, thumikoteron eram iocatus. id tu, si ille aliter acceperit ac debuit, lenies. 'MONETALI' autem adscripsi, quod ille ad me 'PRO COS.' sed quoniam est homo et nos diligit, ipse quoque a nobis diligatur. vale.