Letter 10002: Ad virum inlustrem Salutarem

II To the illustrious gentleman Salutaris Among the stealthy wounds of the human condition, which along the uncertain path of wavering minds and slipping times always render our prayers suspect, there is nothing in any matter that torments more than for anyone either not to see what he desires or to see what he is losing; since the trembling soul in either case sinks beneath no small burden, while, hanging in suspense, it gazes long upon what it possesses and, as soon as it has begun to possess it, presently loses it, afflicted, that is, until it obtains, crushed if it loses; but this thing strikes with a heavier dart, that between gazing and losing what has been gazed upon, in the one case hope is stretched out, in the other it is condemned; in the one case the grief is uncertain whether one may have, in the other the sorrow is certain if one must let go. (2) Nature has this implanted in us, brought down to us by the transgression of our first-formed parent and punished with death, that often what is scarcely acquired is presently abandoned; the tooth of the ancient serpent struck so from the root that not even a tree has stood but it lives with death fixed in its stock. (3) This our parental inheritance sent down to posterity, that, lying prostrate before death, we who are bound to die should seek to live: the acquired possession of the unhappy tree wounded all, which with its enticing fruits harmed its offspring before it nourished them; whereby certainly, under the appearance of a feast, death entered in. With its deadly touch it injured both parents and posterity: them the taste, us the juice: since the cup of venomous persuasion, which the father drank to his ruin, he poured over into his offspring and, so to speak, what flowed from the spring ran down into the stream. (4) That mother therefore, by birth a mother but by crime a stepmother, brought this in, unhappy Eve, alone among all, who certainly so built herself up as to destroy the whole, when by the aged contrivance of the snare she ruined the unschooled man and perished herself. But what good would the offspring do, if it should extend itself into reproach even of an evil parent, or by detracting should bite back again at him who once had perished by a bite, since his own fall sufficed for himself, his ruin for us? (5) And so I think it unfitting if I should bite back at him through whom the ungrateful one came for nothing, by whose occasion death began to feed upon the life-giving nourishment, to whom, while the opening of the eyes is promised, the light is put to flight, and, divinity having been promised, the fallen man returns into the earth: hence it is that the harmful food dragged the begotten offspring into prey. (6) That captivity made us exiles in prosperity, partners in adversity, and our pilgrimage is so much the heavier as harsh death is the better known. From old Adam down to the new man our life is born together with death. (7) From this neither did Abel strip himself, nor will Enoch escape, nor did Noah withdraw himself, who by the flood deferred death, did not change it; this the patriarch did not refuse, this law the lawgiver did not turn aside, the prophet endured it, and one more than a prophet succumbed to it: Sarah too, Rebecca, Rachel, Anna, Elisabeth, although of the weaker sex, nevertheless drank together this bitter draught. (8) Why should one complain about the rest, when the very triumpher over death, in respect of the part in which he was made flesh, was also subjected to death? Nor would he have been fully man, if he had not felt even the tomb; nor would he be believed to be God, unless he rose from the sepulcher. (9) Hence it is that I speak, dearest one and joined to me by the vow of faithful affection, in that through your letters you lament the passing of your holy-born daughter, scarcely indicating it, with a sob bursting forth, by your sorrowful pen: that, at ten years of age, with death rushing in, the little blossom of tender youth withered, when, drawn back almost from the marriage threshold, she is given not to the bridal chamber according to her father's wish but to the tomb, and by a contrary song she is handed over not to the marriage couch but to the sepulcher, toward whose vows perhaps the household, already hastening, was glowing with eagerness, the kinfolk and the homeland were busily roused, the mother was held in suspense by prayer, the nurse's own care was rising up: she who was in the reedlike slenderness of youth, rosy in modesty, festively adorned with the art of her own sex. (10) But whither does the grace of beauty carry me off, beauty so quickly fleeting in betraying itself, whither the lying flesh, when, if the glory of the dead girl be proclaimed, the laments increase? (11) You had this, therefore, father, but it was not your own: rather you have returned what was entrusted to you. It is lamented as if lost; but let it be considered not lost, what returns to Christ unblemished. (12) Or do you indeed complain as if you alone had suffered these things, when this misfortune conquers even kings? Are you more fortunate than Augustus, stronger than Alexander, more favored than Trajan, holier than Theodosius? Since the soldier holds this death equal with the prince: that must be patiently grieved which you hold in common with the world. (13) But how many women has it drawn back to the tomb from the very first embrace, and they bore the loss having known a husband, not possessed him: women who are doubly to be lamented: first to lose their modesty, and so to perish! (14) Wherefore, although you complain that you have lost such a child by such a misfortune, yet to no one is it new, that a girl could not avoid this which came through woman. Look rather upon this, that this matter of death may be a matter of virtue, and make yourself equal to the examples of those who, grief being conquered, rise up to the palm of victory. (15) You have therefore, among the very summits of patience, first, as it were upon a watchtower, the standard and rule of Job, who for his sons so gave thanks to the Lord as though he had then received them when he lost them. Which man of experience handed over the whole to the divine will, lest he should fall. (16) What then? Did not brave David, although he had subdued Goliath, lay himself like hay beneath the heavenly nod, when, his son being lost, he washed and feasted? Lest he resist, understanding that he must yield to the one who formed all things, the faithful servant feared to provoke the offense of a good lord even by a murmur. For whom, that he might be joined to the divine nuptials, the devout father continually melted away in tears. But you can conjecture that he would not take away such a one, unless she had pleased his own bridal chambers. Whence do you know the depths of the divine counsel, or what kind of longing lay hidden in the heart of your own daughter? Perhaps she chose beforehand what she deserved, and that came forth which she wished for. (17) For which reason, excellent man, be scarcely a judge to yourself and you are a father; that is, if through love you temper yourself and judge yourself, you do not give offense: especially since the promise of the Redeemer soothes you and the voice of the herald Paul, feigned like thunder, because in the twinkling of an eye the buried will hasten to rise again and will live under the shadow of Christ, secure concerning their virginity.

II Ad virum inlustrem Salutarem Inter humanae condicionis subripientia vulnera, quae semper incerto tramite nu- tantium animorum ac labentium temporum reddunt vota suspecta, nihil est in aliquo aliquid magis quod cruciet, quam quemquam aut non videre quod cupiat aut videre quod perdat; cum trepidans animus in utroque non modico sub fasce succumbat, dum pendulus spectat diuturne quod habeat et, ut habere coeperit, mox amittat, scilicet adflictus donec inpetret, elisus si perdit; sed gravius hoc iaculo res illa percellit, quod inter spectare vel spectata amittere illic spes tenditur, hic damnatur, illic dubius mae- ror an habeat, hic certus dolor est si relinquat. (2) Habet hoc insitum natura prae- varicatione protoplasti parentis ad nos decursa morte multata, ut saepe quod vix ad- quiritur mox linquatur; serpentis inveterati dens a radice sic perculit, ut nec arbor steterit quin stirpe mortis fixa vivat. (3) Misit hoc posteris hereditas parentalis, ut iacentes morti quaeramus vivere morituri: vulnificavit cunctos infelicis arboris adquae- sita possessio, quae blandientibus pomis prolem prius nocuit quam nutrivit; quo certe sub epuli specie mors intravit. ferali tactu laesit hoc parentes et posteros: illos gu- stus, nos sucus: quoniam virulentae suasionis poculum, quod pater male sorbuit, in prolem transfudit et, ut ita dictum sit, quod a fonte manavit, in rivum defluxit. (4) Intulit hoc igitur illa mater de genere sed noverca de crimine, infelix cunctis Eva monades, quod certe sola sic extruit ut universa destrueret, cum veterata machinatione decipulae rudem virum perderet et periret. sed proles quid boni faciat, si se in ca- lumniam vel mali parentis extendat, aut ut illum iterum detrahendo remordeat qui semel morsu perierat, cum ipse sibi suffecerit suus lapsus, noster occasus? (5) Itaque puto incongruum si vel illum remorsero per quem gratis venit ingratum, cuius occasione vitalis alimoniae mors coepit depasci, cui dum oculorum apertio promittitur, lux fugatur et divinitate promissa homo lapsus redit in terram: hinc est quod prolem genitam nocens esca traxit in praedam. (6) Fecit illa captivitas nos prosperis exules, adversis consortes, et tantum peregrinatio gravior, quam mors dura notior. nascitur ab Adam vetere usque ad novum hominem vita nostra cum morte. (7) Hinc se nec Abel exuit nec Enoch effugiet neque Noe se subtraxit, qui diluvio mortem distulit non mutavit; hoc patriarcha non rennuit, hanc legem legifer non avertit, propheta sustinuit et plus quam propheta succubuit: Sarra quoque, Rebecca Rachel Anna Elisabeth, licet sexus inferior, tamen hoc simul bibit amarum. (8) Quid conqueratur de reliquis, cum ipse triumphator mortis pro parte qua caro factus est et morti subiectus est? nec fuerat plenus homo, si non sensisset et tumulum; nec deus crederetur, nisi surgeret de sepulchro. (9) Hinc est quod loquor, carissime et fidae dilectionis mihi voto conexe, eo quod tuos per apices natae sanctae transitum conqueraris, vix singultu rum- pente indicans calamo tristi, decennalis aetatis inruente funere pubertatis tenerae floscula marcuisse, cum paene nuptiali retracta de limine non ad patris votum thalamo datur sed tumulo, et diverso cantico non toro traditur sed sepulchro, ad cuius forte vota iam festinans familia fervebat, sedule parentela excitabatur et patria, mater erat prece suspensa, ipsa adsurgebat cura nutricis: iuncea pubertate, rosea modestate, festiva arte sui sexus ornata. (10) Sed quo me rapit formae decor se prodere tam cito fugax, quo caro mendax, cum defunctae si praedicetur gloria, adcrescant lamenta? (11) Habuisti igitur istud pater, sed non tuum: reddidisti potius commendatum. plo- ratur velut amissum; sed consideretur non perditum quod ad Christum redit intactum. (12) An certe conquereris quasi solus ista perpessus sis, cum casus hic vincat et reges? an felicior Augusto, fortior Alexandro, favorabilior Traiano, sanctior es Theudosio? cum hoc habeat obitu aequale tam miles quam princeps: patienter dolendum est quod habes commune cum mundo. (13) Quantas autem feminas ab ipso primo conplexu retraxit ad tumulum, et pertulerunt dispendium agnito viro, non habito: quae bis la- mentandae sunt: antea pudorem perdere, sic perisse! (14) Vnde quamvis conque- raris talem te tali casu amisisse subolem, nulli tamen novum est, ut non potuisset hoc vitare puella quod venit per feminam. illud potius inspice, ut ista res funeris sit virtutis, et ad illorum exempla te coaequa qui dolore victo surgunt ad palmam. (15) Habes itaque inter ipsa patientiae culmina primum velut in specula Iob censuram et normam, qui pro filiis domino sic gratias retulit tamquam si tunc acceperit cum amisit. qui vir experientiae voluntati divinae tradidit totum, ne caderet. (16) Quid vero? David fortis, licet Goliam subdiderit, non se velut faenum nutui caelesti sub- stravit, cum filio amisso lavit, epulatus est? ne repugnet, intellegens uni cedere qui cuncta formavit, servus fidelis timuit offensam boni domini provocare vel murmure. quem ut iungeretur divinas ad nuptias, iugiter diffluebat pius pater per lacrimas. potestis autem conicere quia talem non tolleret, nisi suis thalamis placuisset. unde nosti abyssos divini consilii vel tuae natae qualis in corde concupiscentia latitavit? fortassis hoc antea elegit quod meruit et illud prodiit quod optavit. (17) Qua de re, vir optime, esto tibi vix iudex et pater es; hoc est si per caritatem te tem- peres et te iudices, non offendis: praesertim cum te mitiget promissio redemptoris et praeconis Pauli vox simulata tonitrui, quia in ictu oculi resurgere maturabunt sepulti et vivent sub umbra Christi, de virginitate securi.