Marcus Caelius Rufus→Marcus Tullius Cicero|c. 50 BC|Cicero|From Rome|To Rome|AI-assisted
I do not know how quickly you want to leave that place. For my part, the more successfully you have acted so far, the more I will be tormented, as long as you are there, by the danger of a Parthian war, for fear some alarm may spoil this laughter of mine.
I gave this shorter letter suddenly to a tax-collector's courier who was in a hurry. The day before, I gave a longer letter to your freedman. Nothing new has really happened - unless you want these sorts of items written to you, and of course you do.
The younger Cornificius has betrothed himself to Orestilla's daughter. Paulla Valeria, Triarius's sister, divorced her husband without giving a reason on the very day he was to arrive from his province; she is going to marry Decimus Brutus, though she has not yet reported it to the pontiffs. Many unbelievable things of this kind have happened while you were away.
Servius Ocella would never have persuaded anyone that he was an adulterer if he had not been caught twice in three days. You will ask: where? By Hercules, in the last place I would have wished. I leave you something to ask others about. I rather enjoy the thought of an imperator questioning one person after another about which woman someone was caught with.
CCXLII (Fam. VIII, 7) M. CAELIUS RUFUS TO CICERO (IN CILICIA) ROME (FEBRUARY) How soon you want to quit your province I don't know; for myself, the greater your success up to now, the more shall I be tormented by the danger of a Parthian war, as long as you remain where you are, for fear some alarm should dissipate the laughter in which I usually indulge. This letter is shorter than usual, but the letter-carrier of the publicani was in a hurry, and I was suddenly called upon for it. I had already delivered a longer one to your freedman. Moreover, absolutely nothing new has happened, unless you would like my letter to be filled with such anecdotes as the following (and I am sure you would): The younger Cornificius has betrothed himself to Orestilla 's daughter Paulla Valeria , sister of Triarius , has divorced her husband without cause alleged, on the very day he was to arrive from his province. She is going to marry D. Brutus . She has yet given no notice to the pontifices. Servius Ocella would never have convinced anybody that he was an adulterer, if he had not been twice caught in three days. You will ask where? In the last place, by Hercules , I should have wished! I leave you something to find out from others. And I rather like the idea of an imperator questioning one person after another with what woman so-and — so has been caught.
VII. Scr. Romae Nonis Martiis a.u.c. 704. CAELIUS CICERONI SAL.
Quam cito tu istinc decedere cupias, nescio; ego quidem eo magis, quo adhuc felicius res gessisti, dum istic eris, de belli Parthici periculo cruciabor, ne hunc risum meum metus aliqui perturbet. Breviores has litteras properanti publicanorum tabellario subito dedi; tuo liberto pluribus verbis scriptas pridie dederam. Res autem novae nullae sane acciderunt, nisi haec vis tibi scribi, quae certe vis: Cornificius adolescens Orestillae filiam sibi despondit; Paulla Valeria, soror Triarii, divortium sine causa, quo die vir e provincia venturus erat, fecit: nuptura est D. Bruto; nondum ** rettuleras. Multa in hoc genere incredibilia te absente acciderunt. Servius Ocella nemini persuasisset se moechum esse, nisi triduo bis deprehensus esset. Quaeres: "ubi?" ubi hercules ego minime vellem: relinquo tibi, quod ab aliis quaeras; neque enim displicet mihi imperatorem singulos percontari, cum qua sit aliqui deprehensus.
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I do not know how quickly you want to leave that place. For my part, the more successfully you have acted so far, the more I will be tormented, as long as you are there, by the danger of a Parthian war, for fear some alarm may spoil this laughter of mine.
I gave this shorter letter suddenly to a tax-collector's courier who was in a hurry. The day before, I gave a longer letter to your freedman. Nothing new has really happened - unless you want these sorts of items written to you, and of course you do.
The younger Cornificius has betrothed himself to Orestilla's daughter. Paulla Valeria, Triarius's sister, divorced her husband without giving a reason on the very day he was to arrive from his province; she is going to marry Decimus Brutus, though she has not yet reported it to the pontiffs. Many unbelievable things of this kind have happened while you were away.
Servius Ocella would never have persuaded anyone that he was an adulterer if he had not been caught twice in three days. You will ask: where? By Hercules, in the last place I would have wished. I leave you something to ask others about. I rather enjoy the thought of an imperator questioning one person after another about which woman someone was caught with.
AI-assisted translation - This translation was produced with AI assistance and has not been peer-reviewed. See the 19th-century translation or original Latin/Greek below for scholarly use.
Latin / Greek Original
VII. Scr. Romae Nonis Martiis a.u.c. 704. CAELIUS CICERONI SAL.
Quam cito tu istinc decedere cupias, nescio; ego quidem eo magis, quo adhuc felicius res gessisti, dum istic eris, de belli Parthici periculo cruciabor, ne hunc risum meum metus aliqui perturbet. Breviores has litteras properanti publicanorum tabellario subito dedi; tuo liberto pluribus verbis scriptas pridie dederam. Res autem novae nullae sane acciderunt, nisi haec vis tibi scribi, quae certe vis: Cornificius adolescens Orestillae filiam sibi despondit; Paulla Valeria, soror Triarii, divortium sine causa, quo die vir e provincia venturus erat, fecit: nuptura est D. Bruto; nondum ** rettuleras. Multa in hoc genere incredibilia te absente acciderunt. Servius Ocella nemini persuasisset se moechum esse, nisi triduo bis deprehensus esset. Quaeres: "ubi?" ubi hercules ego minime vellem: relinquo tibi, quod ab aliis quaeras; neque enim displicet mihi imperatorem singulos percontari, cum qua sit aliqui deprehensus.