Letter 117: Severus tells Theodore that ascetic desire must not endanger wife, children, or household salvation.

Severus tells Theodore the tribune and notary that he still sees in him the torch of divine light. Theodore nearly entered the philosophic life, but he restrained that desire by the bridle of God's law: a man bound to a wife must not seek release, and spouses may abstain only by mutual consent for a time. If Theodore has drawn his wife into the same zeal for continence and prayer, Severus says, then he may withdraw to that life. But if she remains attached to ordinary married life and cannot restrain the body's impulse, Theodore must not seek only his own good. Christianity is governed by love of neighbor, and no neighbor is nearer than the wife who has become one flesh with him. A man cannot pursue salvation while neglecting the salvation of his own household. Severus also warns that consent is not real if a wife lets a husband leave while she herself falls into worldly pleasure. Consent means a shared commitment to continence, or at least to chastity. Paul's permission is plural: the couple withdraws for prayer, not one spouse abandoning the other under religious cover. Theodore must therefore test the desire carefully. If separation would make his wife stumble, it is not spiritual courage but a failure of love. If Theodore obeys this counsel, he will gain both the reward of philosophical desire and the reward of educating his children in the Lord. Severus reminds him that holiness can be practiced in every station, especially with the help of his good namesake and fellow believer. He remembers Theodore and his household with affection, praising their modesty, gentleness, serious piety, and mercy toward the needy. Even Theodore's father Asclepius receives honor if the wealth he gathered becomes material for beneficence. Theodore should feed his children by good works and leave them to God as their patron.

I think that I still see the torch ^ of the divine light shining in you, under the influence of which you would have almost gone so far as to betake yourself to the philosophic life, had it not been that you restrained that tyrannical desire like some fiery steed by the bits of God's laws. What are the bits? " Art thou bound to a wife? seek not release." And again " Let every man in the calling wherein he was called therein abide." And again, " Deprive not one another, except yourselves up to prayer, and again come together."^ If then you have by devout and God-loving conduct attached your spouse to the same zeal and yearning for A.a/A7ra8a. " i Co. vii. 27, 29, 5. the good life, fly, and withdraw to philosophy. But, if she has not attained to this excellence, and cleaves to the life here, and is unable to restrain the impulse of the flesh, seek not your own good but your fellow's,^ The whole force of Christianity as well as the command- ment supporting the law and the prophets that says, "Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself,"" points to this: the commandment which the Lord above all fulfilled when He graciously showed Himself to us by His coming in the flesh, and He said "A new com- mandment I give unto you that ye love one another as I have loved you, that ye also may love one another; and by this shall every man know that ye are my disciples, if ye love one another." ^ How then shall we not offend against the laws of love, if we suffer the wife who has been reckoned to be one and the same flesh with us to perish.-^ for, just as no man of sense prays that his head may be sound, while his other members are afflicted with paralysis, or are filled with disease, (for the head also will certainly share in the malady), so it is not in accordance with sound understanding for us to con- cern ourselves about our own salvation, while we neglect p. 494- our wife's, when we shall on her account be brought to hell. Although in the Gospels with leaving father or mother or children there is also included without division the leaving of a wife,* yet this must necessarily be subject to the later apostolic distinction. In fact in ^ John xiii. 34, 35. * Mt. xix. 29. external laws also, and in fine in every statute and conception general loose statements assuredly follow later distinctions. That the wise Paul understands the meaning of the Lord's laws better than we do we shall admit even against our will. But let us not think it the wife's consent if the wife permit the husband to go merely in order that he may betake himself to a life of continence, while she turns aside to the pleasure of worldly passions and a dissolute life; but only if she choose the same continence and philosophy as the husband, or, if not this, at least chastity and purity. Indeed, when Paul permitted separation from society by consent, he used the plural, saying, " in order that ye may give yourselves up to prayer," and not " in order that the husband alone may give himself up," or contrariwise "the wife." This epistle I have written to you in proportion to my poverty. If you obey this, you will obtain the reward for the choice of philosophy, and that for the education of your children, training them "in the training and teachino- of the Lord ".^ practise philosophy, seeing that you have a soul- possessing pillar of excellence in that sharer of your name and your belief and man of God: whom also 1 beg you greet. Who could voluntarily forget you, good couple that you are, the modesty of your character, the gentleness ^ Eph. vi. 4. of your thoughts, your sadness, your cheerfulness? For, while you are sad for piety's sake, you yet also by God's grace avoid wildbeast-like harshness, and you show the mercy of pity towards the needy and poor. Through you your father Asclepius of learned and illustrious memory also reaps a blessing, inasmuch as it was to form the material of your beneficence that he amassed the profits derived from law-courts. For alone, if I may so say, with few others he failed to conform to the passage of Koheleth that says, "There is a sickness which I have seen under the sun, riches kept for him that springs from them to his hurt."^ Wherefore also you seem in your sleep to see him feasting when you are justified. Accordingly as one that is wise in the Lord take the same Koheleth as a good counsellor and " all that thy hand findeth to do do according to thy might "; " and reverse the order, and feed your children by good works, and leave them to God as a patron