Marcus Tullius Cicero→Titus Pomponius Atticus|c. 47 BC|Cicero|From Rome|To Rome/Athens|AI-assisted
I am very grateful for your letter, in which you carefully recorded everything you think concerns me. You say they approve both of my actions and of my keeping my lictors, just as Sestius is allowed to keep his. In his case, though, I think it is less a matter of permission than of Caesar himself assigning them to him. I am told Caesar rejects all decrees of the Senate passed after the tribunes' departure. If he wants to be consistent, then, he will be able to approve my lictors.
But what is the point of talking about lictors when I have practically been ordered to leave Italy? Antony sent me a copy of a letter from Caesar, in which Caesar said he had heard that Cato and Lucius Metellus had come to Italy and intended to live openly at Rome. He did not like that, for fear it might cause some disturbance, and said that no one may enter Italy until he has personally examined their case. He put the point very strongly. So Antony wrote asking my pardon and saying he could not help obeying the letter. I then sent Lucius Lamia to him to point out that Caesar had told Dolabella to write and tell me to come to Italy as soon as possible, and that I came on the strength of that letter. Antony then issued an edict exempting Laelius and me by name. I wish he had not done that; he could have made the exception without naming names.
What a pile of troubles, and how serious. You are doing your best to make them lighter, and with some success. Indeed the very fact that you try so hard to relieve me is itself some relief. I hope you will not find it burdensome to do this as often as possible. But you will succeed best if you can convince me that I have not entirely lost the good opinion of the loyal party. Yet what can you do there? Nothing, of course. Still, if any opening appears, that is what will console me most. I see that at present it is impossible. But if anything does turn up, as in this present case, the charge used to be that I should have gone with Pompey; now his death tends to absolve me from blame for neglecting that duty. Where I am thought most at fault is in not going to Africa. My view was that foreign auxiliaries drawn from a most treacherous race were not the proper defenders of the state, especially against an army that had won so many victories. That view may not be approved. I hear that many patriots have arrived in Africa, and I know some were already there. This is what really troubles me. Here again I must trust to luck: perhaps some of them, or if possible all of them, will put safety first. If they hold firm and succeed, you see what position I shall be in. You will ask, "What if they are defeated?" That is a more honorable blow. This is what tortures me.
You have not told me why you do not prefer Sulpicius' policy to mine. It may not be as glorious as Cato's, but at least it is free from danger and regret. The final case is that of those who stayed in Achaia. Even they are in a better position than I am, because there are many of them together, and when they do come to Italy they will go straight home. Please continue your efforts to improve my position and to win as many people as possible over to approval.
You explain why you do not come. Yes, I know your reasons and think it is in my interest for you to stay where you are, first so that you can carry out any necessary negotiations about me with the proper people, as you have done. And I would like to call your attention to this point above all: I think many people have reported, or will report, to Caesar that I regret my policy or that I do not approve recent events. Both things are true, but they say it out of spite toward me, not because they have seen the truth. Everything depends on the support of Balbus and Oppius, and on their confirming Caesar's goodwill toward me by frequent letters to him. Please do your best to bring that about.
The other reason I prefer you not to leave is that you say Tullia begs for your help. What a misfortune. What can I say? What can I even wish? I will cut this short; tears come to my eyes at once. I give you a free hand. Look to it yourself. Only take care that nothing is done in the present circumstances to offend the great man. I beg your pardon. Tears and sorrow prevent me from staying longer on this subject. I will add only that nothing makes me more grateful to you than your love for her.
You are quite right to send letters in my name to anyone you think necessary. I have met a man who saw young Quintus at Samos and his father at Sicyon. They will easily obtain pardon. I only hope that, since they will see Caesar first, they will think fit to further my case with him as much as I would have furthered theirs, if I had been able.
You ask me to take it well if there is anything in your letters that wounds me. I promise to take it in the best possible way, and I beg you to write everything quite openly, as you do, and as often as possible. Farewell. December 17.
I am much obliged to you for your letter, in which you have recorded carefully everything you think concerns me. So you say that they approve both of my actions, and of my keeping my lictors, as Sestius is allowed to keep his: though in his case I think it is not so much a question of being allowed to keep
them as of their being assigned to him by Caesar himself. For I am told he repudiates all the decrees of the Senate which were passed after the departure of the tribunes. So, if he wants to be consistent, he will be able to approve my lictors.
However, what is the use of talking about lictors, when I have almost been ordered to leave Italy. For Antony has sent me a copy of a letter from Caesar, in which he said he had heard that Cato and L. Metellus had come to Italy and intended to live openly at Rome: that he did not like, for fear it might cause some disturbance: and that none may enter Italy, until he has himself investigated their case. He put the point very strongly. So Antony wrote asking my pardon, and saying he could not help obeying the letter. Then I sent L. Lamia to him to point out that Caesar had told Dolabella to write and tell me to come to Italy as soon as possible: and that it was on the strength of that letter that I had come. Then Antony issued an edict excepting myself and Laelius by name. I wish he had not done that: he might have made an exception without mentioning names.
What a heap of troubles and how serious too! And you are doing your best to make them lighter, and with some success—indeed that you try so hard to relieve me is some relief in itself. I hope you won't find it a burden to do so as often as possible. But you will succeed in your object best, if you can convince me that I have not entirely lost the good opinion of the loyal party. Yet what can you do in that matter? Nothing of course. But, if anything gives a chance, that is what will best console me. I see that at present it is impossible:
but if anything does turns up, as in this present case. It used to be said that I ought to have gone with Pompey: but now his death tends to absolve me from blame for neglecting my duty in that case. But where I am thought to have been most lacking is in not going to Africa. My view was that barbarian auxiliaries drawn from a most deceitful race were not the proper persons to defend the State, especially against an army which had won so many victories. That view may not meet with approval; for I hear that many patriots have arrived in Africa, and I know there were some there before. This is a point that really bothers me: and here again I must trust to luck, that there may be some of them, or, if such a thing is possible, all of them, who put safety first. For, if they hold fast and succeed, you can see what a position I shall be in. You will say "How about it, if they are defeated?" That is a more honourable blow. This is what tortures me. However, you have not told me why you do not prefer Sulpicius' policy to mine. It may not be so glorious as Cato's: but it is at any rate free from danger and regret. The last case is that of those who stayed in Achaia. Even they are in a better position than I am, because there are many of them together, and, when they do come to Italy, they will go straight home. Please continue your efforts to ameliorate my position and to win over as many people as possible to approval.
You explain why you do not come. Yes, I know your reasons and think it is to my interest that you should stay where you are, for one thing that you may be able to carry out any necessary negotiations about me with the proper persons, as you have done.
And in the first place I should like to call your attention to this point. I think there are many who have reported or will report to Caesar either that I am repenting of my policy or that I do not approve of recent events. Though both are true, they say it out of spite against me, not because they have seen it to be so. Everything rests on the support of Balbus and Oppius, and on their confirming Caesar's good will to me by sending him frequent letters. Please do your best to bring this about. The other reason why I prefer you not to leave is that you say Tullia begs for your assistance. What a misfortune? What can I say? What can I even wish? I will cut the matter short, for tears spring to my eyes at once. I give you a free hand: do you look to it. Only take care that nothing is done under the present circumstances to offend the great man. I crave your pardon. Tears and sorrow prevent me from dwelling any longer on this topic. I will only add that nothing makes me feel more grateful to you than your love for her.
You are quite right to send letters for me to anyone to whom you think it necessary. I have met a man who saw young Quintus at Samos and his father at Sicyon. They will easily obtain their pardon. I only hope, that, as they will see Caesar first, they will think fit to further my case with him, as much as I should have furthered theirs, if I had been able.
You ask me to take it in good part, if there is anything in your letters that wounds my feelings. I promise you to take it in the best possible part, and I beg you to write everything quite openly, as you do, and to do so as often as possible. Farewell.
Dec. 17.
[1] sollicitum esse te cum de tuis communibusque fortunis tum maxime de me ac de dolore meo sentio. qui quidem meus dolor non modo non minuitur cum socium sibi adiungit dolorem tuum sed etiam augetur. omnino pro tua prudentia sentis qua consolatione levari maxime possim. probas enim meum consilium negasque mihi quicquam tali tempore potius faciendum fuisse. addis etiam (quod etsi mihi levius est quam tuum iudicium, tamen non est leve) ceteris quoque, id est qui pondus habeant, factum nostrum probari. id si ita putarem, levius dolerem. [2] 'crede' inquis 'mihi.' credo equidem sed scio quam cupias minui dolorem meum. me discessisse ab armis numquam paenituit. tanta erat in illis crudelitas, tanta cum barbaris gentibus coniunctio ut non nominatim sed generatim proscriptio esset informata, ut iam omnium iudicio constitutum esset omnium vestrum bona praedam esse illius victoriae. 'vestrum' plane dico; numquam enim de te ipso nisi crudelissime cogitatum est. qua re voluntatis me meae numquam paenitebit, consili paenitet. in oppido aliquo mallem resedisse quoad accerserer; minus sermonis subissem, minus accepissem doloris, ipsum hoc me non angeret. Brundisi iacere in omnis partis est molestum. propius accedere, ut suades, quo modo sine lictoribus quos populus dedit possum? qui mihi incolumi adimi non possunt. quos ego non paulisper cum bacillis in turbam conieci ad oppidum accedens ne quis impetus militum fieret. recipio tempore me domo te nunc. [3] ad Oppium (et Balbum scripsi) [et] quonam iis placeret modo propius accedere ut hac de re considerarent. credo fore auctores. sic enim recipiunt, Caesari non modo de conservanda sed etiam de augenda mea dignitate curae fore, meque hortantur ut magno animo sim, ut omnia summa sperem. ea spondent, confirmant. quae quidem mihi exploratiora essent, si remansissem. sed ingero praeterita; vide, quaeso, igitur ea quae restant et explora cum istis et, si putabis opus esse et si istis placebit, quo magis factum nostrum Caesar probet quasi de suorum sententia factum, adhibeantur Trebonius, Pansa, si qui alii, scribantque ad Caesarem me quicquid fecerim de sua sententia fecisse. [4] Tulliae meae morbus et imbecillitas corporis me exanimat. quam tibi intellego magnae curae esse, quod est mihi gratissimum. [5] de Pompei exitu mihi dubium numquam fuit. tanta enim desperatio rerum eius omnium regum et populorum animos occuparat ut quocumque venisset hoc putarem futurum. non possum eius casum non dolere; hominem enim integrum et castum et gravem cognovi. [6] de Fannio consoler te? perniciosa loquebatur de mansione tua. L. vero Lentulus Hortensi domum sibi et Caesaris hortos et Baias desponderat. omnino haec eodem modo ex hac parte fiunt, nisi quod illud erat infinitum. omnes enim qui in Italia manserant hostium numero habebantur. sed velim haec aliquando solutiore animo. Quintum fratrem audio profectum in Asiam ut deprecaretur. de filio nihil audivi; sed quaere ex Diochare Caesaris liberto quem ego non vidi, qui istas Alexandrea litteras attulit. is dicitur vidisse Quintum euntem an iam in Asia. tuas litteras prout res postulat exspecto. quas velim cures quam primum ad me perferendas. iiii K. Decembr.
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I am very grateful for your letter, in which you carefully recorded everything you think concerns me. You say they approve both of my actions and of my keeping my lictors, just as Sestius is allowed to keep his. In his case, though, I think it is less a matter of permission than of Caesar himself assigning them to him. I am told Caesar rejects all decrees of the Senate passed after the tribunes' departure. If he wants to be consistent, then, he will be able to approve my lictors.
But what is the point of talking about lictors when I have practically been ordered to leave Italy? Antony sent me a copy of a letter from Caesar, in which Caesar said he had heard that Cato and Lucius Metellus had come to Italy and intended to live openly at Rome. He did not like that, for fear it might cause some disturbance, and said that no one may enter Italy until he has personally examined their case. He put the point very strongly. So Antony wrote asking my pardon and saying he could not help obeying the letter. I then sent Lucius Lamia to him to point out that Caesar had told Dolabella to write and tell me to come to Italy as soon as possible, and that I came on the strength of that letter. Antony then issued an edict exempting Laelius and me by name. I wish he had not done that; he could have made the exception without naming names.
What a pile of troubles, and how serious. You are doing your best to make them lighter, and with some success. Indeed the very fact that you try so hard to relieve me is itself some relief. I hope you will not find it burdensome to do this as often as possible. But you will succeed best if you can convince me that I have not entirely lost the good opinion of the loyal party. Yet what can you do there? Nothing, of course. Still, if any opening appears, that is what will console me most. I see that at present it is impossible. But if anything does turn up, as in this present case, the charge used to be that I should have gone with Pompey; now his death tends to absolve me from blame for neglecting that duty. Where I am thought most at fault is in not going to Africa. My view was that foreign auxiliaries drawn from a most treacherous race were not the proper defenders of the state, especially against an army that had won so many victories. That view may not be approved. I hear that many patriots have arrived in Africa, and I know some were already there. This is what really troubles me. Here again I must trust to luck: perhaps some of them, or if possible all of them, will put safety first. If they hold firm and succeed, you see what position I shall be in. You will ask, "What if they are defeated?" That is a more honorable blow. This is what tortures me.
You have not told me why you do not prefer Sulpicius' policy to mine. It may not be as glorious as Cato's, but at least it is free from danger and regret. The final case is that of those who stayed in Achaia. Even they are in a better position than I am, because there are many of them together, and when they do come to Italy they will go straight home. Please continue your efforts to improve my position and to win as many people as possible over to approval.
You explain why you do not come. Yes, I know your reasons and think it is in my interest for you to stay where you are, first so that you can carry out any necessary negotiations about me with the proper people, as you have done. And I would like to call your attention to this point above all: I think many people have reported, or will report, to Caesar that I regret my policy or that I do not approve recent events. Both things are true, but they say it out of spite toward me, not because they have seen the truth. Everything depends on the support of Balbus and Oppius, and on their confirming Caesar's goodwill toward me by frequent letters to him. Please do your best to bring that about.
The other reason I prefer you not to leave is that you say Tullia begs for your help. What a misfortune. What can I say? What can I even wish? I will cut this short; tears come to my eyes at once. I give you a free hand. Look to it yourself. Only take care that nothing is done in the present circumstances to offend the great man. I beg your pardon. Tears and sorrow prevent me from staying longer on this subject. I will add only that nothing makes me more grateful to you than your love for her.
You are quite right to send letters in my name to anyone you think necessary. I have met a man who saw young Quintus at Samos and his father at Sicyon. They will easily obtain pardon. I only hope that, since they will see Caesar first, they will think fit to further my case with him as much as I would have furthered theirs, if I had been able.
You ask me to take it well if there is anything in your letters that wounds me. I promise to take it in the best possible way, and I beg you to write everything quite openly, as you do, and as often as possible. Farewell. December 17.
AI-assisted translation - This translation was produced with AI assistance and has not been peer-reviewed. See the 19th-century translation or original Latin/Greek below for scholarly use.
Latin / Greek Original
[1] sollicitum esse te cum de tuis communibusque fortunis tum maxime de me ac de dolore meo sentio. qui quidem meus dolor non modo non minuitur cum socium sibi adiungit dolorem tuum sed etiam augetur. omnino pro tua prudentia sentis qua consolatione levari maxime possim. probas enim meum consilium negasque mihi quicquam tali tempore potius faciendum fuisse. addis etiam (quod etsi mihi levius est quam tuum iudicium, tamen non est leve) ceteris quoque, id est qui pondus habeant, factum nostrum probari. id si ita putarem, levius dolerem. [2] 'crede' inquis 'mihi.' credo equidem sed scio quam cupias minui dolorem meum. me discessisse ab armis numquam paenituit. tanta erat in illis crudelitas, tanta cum barbaris gentibus coniunctio ut non nominatim sed generatim proscriptio esset informata, ut iam omnium iudicio constitutum esset omnium vestrum bona praedam esse illius victoriae. 'vestrum' plane dico; numquam enim de te ipso nisi crudelissime cogitatum est. qua re voluntatis me meae numquam paenitebit, consili paenitet. in oppido aliquo mallem resedisse quoad accerserer; minus sermonis subissem, minus accepissem doloris, ipsum hoc me non angeret. Brundisi iacere in omnis partis est molestum. propius accedere, ut suades, quo modo sine lictoribus quos populus dedit possum? qui mihi incolumi adimi non possunt. quos ego non paulisper cum bacillis in turbam conieci ad oppidum accedens ne quis impetus militum fieret. recipio tempore me domo te nunc. [3] ad Oppium (et Balbum scripsi) [et] quonam iis placeret modo propius accedere ut hac de re considerarent. credo fore auctores. sic enim recipiunt, Caesari non modo de conservanda sed etiam de augenda mea dignitate curae fore, meque hortantur ut magno animo sim, ut omnia summa sperem. ea spondent, confirmant. quae quidem mihi exploratiora essent, si remansissem. sed ingero praeterita; vide, quaeso, igitur ea quae restant et explora cum istis et, si putabis opus esse et si istis placebit, quo magis factum nostrum Caesar probet quasi de suorum sententia factum, adhibeantur Trebonius, Pansa, si qui alii, scribantque ad Caesarem me quicquid fecerim de sua sententia fecisse. [4] Tulliae meae morbus et imbecillitas corporis me exanimat. quam tibi intellego magnae curae esse, quod est mihi gratissimum. [5] de Pompei exitu mihi dubium numquam fuit. tanta enim desperatio rerum eius omnium regum et populorum animos occuparat ut quocumque venisset hoc putarem futurum. non possum eius casum non dolere; hominem enim integrum et castum et gravem cognovi. [6] de Fannio consoler te? perniciosa loquebatur de mansione tua. L. vero Lentulus Hortensi domum sibi et Caesaris hortos et Baias desponderat. omnino haec eodem modo ex hac parte fiunt, nisi quod illud erat infinitum. omnes enim qui in Italia manserant hostium numero habebantur. sed velim haec aliquando solutiore animo. Quintum fratrem audio profectum in Asiam ut deprecaretur. de filio nihil audivi; sed quaere ex Diochare Caesaris liberto quem ego non vidi, qui istas Alexandrea litteras attulit. is dicitur vidisse Quintum euntem an iam in Asia. tuas litteras prout res postulat exspecto. quas velim cures quam primum ad me perferendas. iiii K. Decembr.